Advent Conspiracy

So it's back to school, and already I feel the final weeks weighing down on me. But less on that, and MORE on THIS!

So today I visited my home church CCC+C. As Pastor LT closed out by talking about this organization called Advent Conspiracy. Their motto is Worship FULLY, Spend LESS, Give MORE, Love ALL When I saw it in the church bulletin that phrase really blew me away. So simple but so powerful were these words. Advent Conspiracy is about trying to raise money for clean water around the world and rallying churches together to get it done. And while we don't have GCC plugged into this organization, the message in general for this holiday to me was REALLY POWERFUL. As we enter this holiday season, I really hope we can focus on our relationships with one another and God, and not so much about those little things. Please watch these promotion videos. I'm not asking you to join this cause because I know as college students we don't always have much, but think about the message they're trying to send us, their audience, and let's enjoy this winter season together! :)

Thanksgiving

So I had this long Thanksgiving post about how I'm thankful for all these people and things in my life but I deleted it because I didn't like what I wrote. This year has been pretty difficult but I'm thankful for all of it and all the interactions I've had with so many great people. Usually I write about who I'm thankful for and why but this year, if you really want to know just ask and I'll tell you why I'm thankful for you! :) I hope that you guys have had a good holiday and have been safe :)

School soon...sad

P.S. I posted a few pics on facebook!

Childish

So I start with digressing from my title right away. NINJA ASSASSIN!!!! Okay... to be honest it wasn't that good. Girls if you really want to see Rain, I hope you don't have a weak stomach for blood and gore and seeing people's heads cut open. Terrible dialogue and plot but the action was SICKKKK!!!! :D

Okay back on track. So on my way back from the movies I was walking back from the bus stop and I saw these two kids poking their heads out the window of the SUV they were in. My first thought was... "Wow, what kind of parents let their kids do something like that? I mean seriously the kids had half of their body OUT OF THE WINDOW!" But I was actually really blessed by what they said as they were at the red light. They were looking at the Verizon building that's in Chinatown. It's right across the street from Hong Kong bakery and Choo Choo's. They were looking and pointing at it and said with such amazement, "WOOOOOOOOOOOW that building is SOOOO BIG AND PRETTY!!!!!" When I looked at the building all I saw was, an internet service that cuts out every now and then, and a cell phone that doesn't do what I want it to do such as making calls and sending texts.

But as I thought about it, I was really blessed by those kids' amazement at such a puny and awkwardly placed building. This isn't one of those beauty in the broken posts but instead what struck me most was the kids' perspective on the things around them. This past week Pastor Young spoke of how God baby's us a lot when were young and as we grow older and more mature, there is less of it because we know where to find our footing in God. But I think there is another point to this whole topic of God babying us less and less. Aside from growing older and more mature, I wish for that childlike perspective again, where everything around me is truly amazing so that I can find continual refreshment in the blessings in my life. I think this is an awesome way to look at things going into Thanksgiving. :)

Humor Me

God's humor never ceases to amaze me. While some people may not believe that God is one to humor us, I strongly disagree. I feel that God can humor us to teach us, humble us, and eventually lead us in the directions he wants us to go. Have you ever approached a situation thinking that you would not succeed so you didn't? For me that happens a lot but the next part is the interesting part. For some reason you feel compelled by either conviction or self motivation to actually approach or attempt whatever it is. By this time I would already be in motion only to be stumped by God. He'll say no or humble me telling me that what I wanted was overly ambitious or just not right. And the moment you humble yourself, He brings that element back in to your life.

It's funny how these things work. It could be a person you've liked for a long time who you have given up on, only to find that the moment you let go, God brings her presence back in stronger than ever. I can't help but laugh at something like that. Not that it changes anything at the moment.

I could list a bunch of occassions this has happened to me. Promotions, internships, relationships, it happens everywhere for me and I have actually learned a lot from it. I think one of my favorite moments was my freshman year in Overflow. We were pairing off for a piece and I told myself I wouldn't mind being paired with any of the girls except for this one girl. Low and behold I was paired with the one I didn't wish to be with. But God taught me two things here. One, love each person equally, especially in a family such as Overflow, and two, "I use people who you would think the least likely to reach out to you and love you."

A lot of people have different words describing God. Savior, healer, my salvation, so on and so forth. But for me the most accurate word describing how He impacts my life is Deliverer. God has delivered me from so many problematic things and has brought so many wonderful things and people into my life... It just happens that a lot of it seems to make me laugh and for that I'm thankful :)

The Turkleton Conundrum

PASSION!!! First off I'd like to say that this weekend and the Passion Revival at GCC was amazing. Bringing it back to the basics were definitely needed and the prayer done and received was very refreshing. But more on that later. A lot of people seem to be writing on it, plus I have other stuff on my mind. Well actually, I'll probably tie it in with Passion a little bit :)

So in an attempt to kick back and find a way to distract myself from all the chaos in my life, I threw season one of Scrubs into my DVD player earlier this week. First off might I say that Scrubs is AWESOME and probably one of my favorite shows ever. Regardless of how awesome the show is, I digress. There was an episode that really struck me and got me thinking. But before I get to my point, here's a little plot summary. I'll try to keep it short.

In season one, three of the main characters are fresh out of medical school and are interning at a hospital together. Considering it's a major change in lifestyle for all of them, their eyes are opened to many things they never thought about. The character I want to focus on is Chris Turk. Okay plot summary over.

During this episode, it's the Christmas holiday. Turk loves Christmas and has always believed that God is always watching over everyone, so during the holiday season he's especially festive and excited. However it's his first time working in a hospital over Christmas and he sees all sorts of people coming in because of various accidents and problems. The scene cuts out as you see all sorts of people getting wheeled into the hospital. At this point it's what Turk says that struck me. He's talking to his girlfriend.

"Honey, all my life I've believed that God watches over us and takes care of us. But tonight on Christmas of all nights, I see all these people come in hurt and on the verge of death. How can I believe that God watches over us when I see all these people that I can't help die in front of me"

At this point, my heart definitely ached and I was really broken. It made me think about all the people around us including ourselves as our faiths are tested by various events. It's so easy to lose hope because of some of the negativity that surrounds us at times, and that can lead to us stumbling. As I thought about this, I thought about the future and what kind of things ahead are going to test me. And while I know what lies ahead is definitely not going to be easy, I want to tackle it on faith alone. The line from the song Hosanna "Break my heart for what breaks yours" popped up in my head, and to be honest, since Passion that line has been with me.

God has given us so many gifts and talents, and when we see all these people hurt and aching around us, we CANNOT lose faith. With our talents and blessings, we should reach out and help those around it. It does not take a doctor to do that (well sometimes it does :P). I don't think I need to post Matthew 25 in here.

So here's my tie in with Passion:

God, break my heart for what breaks yours. Strengthen me so that I can straighten myself in You in times of trouble, that I may be able to rise up to whatever occasion with complete faith and trust in you that Your love and blessings may pour from me to those who need you and who You cry for. Use me.

Maturity

So last night I got the rare chance to see an old face that I don't really get a chance to see or even talk to for that matter and it was REALLY refreshing just to catch up. Caught up on school, friends, Christ, relationships, and other random happenings and we both came to one thought. We don't know anything! Looking back to our freshman year we both respected and looked up to our upperclassmen. They seemed to have all the answers and spoke great words of wisdom into our hearts that taught and convicted us to live our lives for God. But here we are as seniors (in our case 4th years) and we both sat there wondering... "So God ... where is this wisdom you gave our older brothers and sisters? How come we don't seem to have all the answers?"

It's kind of funny. I wrote the above portion earlier this afternoon before heading to Passion tonight and ran out of time to finish so I just left this post undone on my laptop. I don't remember what I was going to say or how I was going to finish this post off before Passion but after tonight's revival I know this post is going to go in a completely different direction than I had originally intended.

Tonight's Passion was REALLY good for me. While the message was very light, it hit me hard. As we grow older, whether we like it or not we continuously grow content and cocky. Realizing last night that I don't know squat was just the tip of the iceberg in regards to not knowing anything. As Pastor Sam spoke tonight, he called for us to cry out to God and be like David when he had lost his family and had his own army threaten him with death. Instead of responding in anger or turning to flee, the bible says that David turned to God.

I was going to write earlier about how insecure it feels to not know these answers when there are those around us who look to us and are seeking answers from us. But right now the answer stands in front of me as a slap in the face reminder. CRY out to God! Instead of looking for other ways to get an answer or seek ways to escape our issues, selfishly lay our burdens before God. So right now while I may not have the answers, I know that this is what I can contribute as an example to help those before, behind, and besides me. :) LIVE OUT LOUD!!!

Motion and Expression

Its 2:23 AM and while I know that it's not late for some of you, it's late for me. Usually I'm out around 12-1 but I can't sleep so I thought I'd get some stuff off my chest.

Song and dance are truly amazing. I am so blessed that God has placed these two things in my life and at such a high frequency. There is something about it that is beyond description. While I try my best some times to articulate the ramblings inside of my head, sometimes the only way to really get them out is through singing or dancing. Even if the people you want your message to reach don't receive it, belting out your emotions like that can be so satisfying.

Maybe I'm misunderstood or just don't know how to express myself directly through words? Regardless, call it escapism, expression or whatever you want... song and dance shall never cease to amaze and bless me.

Pursuit

Have you ever chased something before for the longest time. And then when you think you're close to your goal or objective, you realize that it's not the direction you want to be going in. On so many different levels this is me right now. It's weird though. If one realizes he or she is going in the wrong direction then chooses a different direction to go in then technically you're saving time instead of continuing on the previously plotted direction. But for some reason I can't bring myself to think like that. The only thing going through my head is "How did I get here?", "Why did I let myself continue like this?", and "What changed?"

Hmmm ... I don't know what to do with myself.